Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Why do Democrats hate cats so much?

(Publisher's note: the following blog post is a continuing feature that provides the kind of change that President-elect Barack Obama has only promised. "Political Mijo"(Mee-Ho -- Spanish for "dear one") is penned by an actual cat, who has his claws hooked into political TV 24/7. Through letters from readers including other felines, he offers his writing to promote needed diversity to national news media coverage and opinion.)

Dear Political Mijo,

I saw on the TV yesterday that the Bidens have purchased a stinky, whining and carpet-pooping German Shepherd puppy for their vice-presidential household. While I can't blame VP Biden for needing a friend since Sen. Clinton will be taking the lead on foreign policy as secretary of state(he'll just go to funerals, the first being for his own political usefulness), a Chia pet would have been more appropriate for him considering his hair plug history.

With Obama picking a puppy for his girls in the White House, cats have been shut out of this administration of change. What in the hell do Democrats have against cats?

Signed,
Litter-Box Livid


Dear Liver-Box Livid,
Boy, are you pissed! And rightly so. This continuing bigotry against cats in the halls of power has left me so depressed that I'm going to have to go out and splurge shop on cat toys.

I have nothing against German Shepherds. Shepherd's Pie with big chunks of barkingly good meat is one of favorites. But puppies -- though cute to very few Americans -- are just too messy for historic places that belong to the taxpayers.

Democrats are making a big mistake, as usual. Our numbers in American households are growing because we're low maintenance and don't each as much as dogs. We're going to prosper in a tough economy. Dogs are destined for buffets.

But get over it for now, my partner in the struggle. Never use the litter box angry.

Signed,
PM

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